Reality Bites..and How...!

Nothing prepares you for the eyesore that is Delhi than the reality check at the Indira Gandhi International Airport. Okay, I can relent a little and state that the airport is indeed being revamped and the city is being spruced up for the Commonwealth Games in 2010, but is there some training planned for the people too? Because unless our ruffian populace is taught a lesson or two in respecting women, hell respecting people at large, I don’t think much good is going to come out of all this so called beautification.

Something is fundamentally very very wrong with the men in this city. They openly stare at women as if they have descended from a planet unknown. Flattering, perhaps one would say. Believe me the look in their eyes is anything but respectful. It is impossible for a woman to venture into certain areas of the city without a male in tow. It is shameful that in this day age a woman needs to think ten times before choosing her attire depending on the areas she will frequent that day. Slacking on this front can lead to circumstances bordering on molestation also popularly known as eve-teasing in this area. It is important to note that no matter how a woman dresses no one has the right to feel that they have the authority to either pass comments in a lewd manner or in a way to make that woman feel uncomfortable. I have seen other societies and nowhere does this exist except for our country where women are supposedly revered. It is ridiculous how such an obscene overture can make a woman doubt herself.

Once on an airline, I was nicely tucked in the window seat, sleeping away the unearthly ours of the flight. I was jolted out of my sleep by my co-passengers hand trying to reach across me in order to shut the window, while innocently ‘brushing’ against me. As I was coming to senses from the slumber I realized there was some thing touching my back, I thought it was possibly my co-passengers foot, who was fidgeting around in his sleep trying to find a comfortable spot. I couldn’t really see because of the blanket and was wondering how to get him to shift when the supposed ‘foot’ started getting a bit too comfortable, I jumped in my seat and removed the blanket only to see him pulling his slimy hand away. I was in a state of shock for several minutes in which he decided to strike up a lame conversation to hide the awkwardness. Well, as soon as I came to my senses.. I ran …ran for the nearest free seat and plopped myself there, thinking, much to my dismay, that was I possibly wearing something that was suggestive. Barely a month ago I was strutting around in France without a care in the world about what I wore, and here I was on an international flight where men’s hands start flailing around independent of rationality and totally devoid of control. On second thought I had dressed well for the flight, nothing flashy, nothing revealing, just a simple pair of cargos teamed with a black shirt. Why am I telling you this? Perhaps to prove to myself that I never brought that incident upon myself, probably to realize that I could have worn a tube top and a miniskirt in some other country and wouldn’t have even invited a second glance let alone a slightly out of control albeit sleazy hand action. Is this the society we are building? One where a woman is confronted by self doubt on having snubbed an insinuating gaze from an unwanted eye? Is this what we call progress?

No amount of tall buildings and fat pay packages can make for a progressive society unless we do something about this deep seated insecurity that hounds every woman in this city. Anti-social elements exist in every society be it any country. But the problem is so widespread here that an untoward incident isn’t a chance occurring, it’s a part and parcel of every woman’s life. The extent varies of course, it can be as casual as a bunch of men laughing over a lady driver in her car at a traffic signal, and it can be as demeaning as a guy producing kissing sounds directed at women crossing the road whilst his rickshaw glides across the road.

I have no reason to believe that I am any less than a man, then why must I be subjected to such obscene behavior? The reasons are etched in social history, an understanding of those might help us fight the problem. But for that we need to acknowledge the problem, at a mass level. There is an easy option of running away, settling in some super developed nation, and visiting your city once every five years. I am very tempted considering the events of late. Then there is another option, one which entails fighting back. Reminding men of their role in upholding the honour of womenfolk ( I know its getting a tad dramatic here), rather than embarrassing them in public. It can start with reprimanding men who resort to measures which lead to writing of such pieces. It can start with stopping the guy who utters obscenities on the road and reminding him politely that he can better impose his manliness in the police station. Walking away should never be an option. There is always a choice, I regret looking for new seats. I should have slapped the guy and prescribed him a sedative for his hand lest it feel the urge to go on an exploring spree anytime soon.